WITCH Advice Givers
by Hakaze Akikaze
Summary: Got a problem? Well WITCH can help! This is helpful and funny! YAY! Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 1 **

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoy this, and have fun. But don't forget, if you see any problems in here that 'someone' has that you have too, then look at the advice for it. It will most definitely help out. Trust me.

* * *

Dear Will, 

My mom doesn't allow me to date, but I have a boyfriend. I want to see him, but I have a bad guilty conscience and my mom would kill me if she found out. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Boy Crazy

Dear Boy Crazy,

I understand completely! You should just try to act more responsible for a few weeks. You know, keep you're room clean, put away the dishes, dust the house, and etc. Then eventually, get your mom and sit down with her at a dinner you made, and then try to slowly break the news to her that you have been seeing a guy and would like to continue seeing him with her consent. Hope this helps you out!

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

Dear Irma, 

This may sound stupid, but I like taking showers for a really long time, but after I get out my parents yell at me for using so much water! What can I do? Please help.

Sincerely,

Water Girl

Dear Water Girl,

I have the exact same problem! Or I _had _the exact same problem. I'll just tell you what I did. Try to see if you can take long showers only every once in a while – like any time that you or any other family member isn't about to go somewhere important. If they still complain about how much water you are using, try a bath instead. It probably uses only half of what you use in the shower. Good luck!

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

I have a little brother, and he's always coming into my room. He goes through my stuff and sometimes plants camera-recorders in my room and films me! He even gets me when I'm changing and stuff! I was so mad when I found out that I wanted to strangle him. I confronted him and told him that if he didn't stop, I'd tell my parents. He just blackmailed me with my diary which has some embarrassing moments in it and the boys' names I have crushes on. What can I do?

Sincerely,

BlAcKmAiLeD

Dear Blackmailed,

That is a serious problem! Well… you could just try changing in the bathroom instead of your bedroom, and make sure you don't do anything else embarrassing. Or you can go ahead and tell your parents and then tell your brother that you know about 'you know what' and you're going to tell 'you know who'. Once he gets in trouble, make sure you get the tapes of yourself and burn them. Oh, and by the way… try to hide your Diary a little better. Or get a safe! Also, you could consider getting a lock for your door.

Sincerely,

Taranee

Dear Taranee,

But what about the 'you know what' and 'you know who'?

Sincerely,

BlAcKmAiLeD

Dear Blackmailed,

Well, you don't have to say anything other than those words. If he's ever done anything else bad in his lifetime, he'll fill in the gaps himself.

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

Dear Cornelia, 

HELP! I'm allergic to dogs, and my best friend just gave me one! I didn't want to say anything to make her mad or sad, so I just accepted it. I now want to give it away or something, but I'm afraid that if my friend finds out, she'll be mad. What can I do?

Sincerely,

Dog-allergenic

Dear Dog-allergenic,

Seems like you're in a tight bind. Well, you could just try to explain to her everything you just told me. That you're allergic to dogs but you didn't want to say anything because you thought she might get upset. If she's your true friend, she'll understand. Hope that helps!

Sincerely,

Cornelia

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I sent this to you because I know you are a great fashion designer. I love clothes, and I'm very creative. But clothes are so expensive these days and my family isn't exactly rich! What can I do?

Sincerely,

Clothe-A-Holic

Dear Clothe-A-Holic,

Vintage! Vintage for a situation you're in is the best way to go. You said you're very creative, so go to Salvation Army or Good Will and get some old jeans or something. Cut them into a skirt or cut some holes into it. You can put glitter on it, patches, buttons, or take sharpies and draw things! You could probably even dye them to make them an extra funky color!

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	2. Chapter 2

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 2**

Disclaimer: I do not own any WITCH things...

* * *

Dear Will, 

My Mom is setting me up with different boys that I don't like! I already have a boyfriend and he's kind of getting mad. I'm afraid he's going to break up with me! What can I do?

Sincerely,

Set-Up

Dear Set-Up,

That's a tough one, but I think you should just calmly ask your mom to stop setting you up. If she wants you to have a boyfriend that bad, tell her that you already have one. If she's not sure about him, have him come over to the house to get to know each other. I hope he isn't a bad guy, and I hope this helps you!

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

Dear Irma, 

Hi. I have a major problem. I love reading books. I know, it doesn't seem like much, but books are so expensive these days! I'm using all my money on books instead of saving it for college. I want to have books, but I also want to have money. What can I do?

Sincerely,

BookFan01

Dear BookFan01,

I'm just going to guess that the money you use to buy the books is your allowance. So, you can get a few neighborhood jobs and put that money in your savings! You could walk dogs, feed and take care of someone's animals while they're away, mow lawns, wash cars, or anything like that! It's a great way to earn some extra cash!

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

My best friend, who has been my friend since Kindergarten, is now talking about me behind my back. Now, a lot of people think I've said things about them because my so-called 'friend' has been telling them I say stuff about them. I'm loosing friends one by one… what can I do?

Sincerely,

Friendless

Dear Friendless,

I'll be your friend! But I would confront your so-called 'best friend' and present this problem to her. Ask her why she's doing it, and I know it's hard, but if you have to stop being friends with her, then do it. It's better to not have a friend like that, than to have a friend like that and be scarred your whole life. And confront the people that she's lying to and try to tell them the truth. Tell them you don't talk about them. If they don't believe you, then just forget about them. You're probably too good for them anyway.

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

Dear Cornelia, 

I just moved to this school, and I don't have any friends. What do you recommend I do to get some?

Sincerely,

NewSchoolGurl

Dear NewSchoolGurl,

Well, there are lots of things you can do! You can get on a sports team, join a group like drama club or something like that, or you can just take yourself into a clique at lunch, sit down, and start making conversation.

Sincerely,

Cornelia

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I have really bad acne. It makes me feel so ashamed, and I try to hide from people. I wasn't usually like this before I was a teen. What can I do?

Sincerely,

ZitFace

Dear ZitFace,

I'm sure it's not that bad. But what you can do is go to the doctor and see what kind of acne-face-wash he recommends for you. You can also drink more water and don't forget to take showers daily. Also, try to keep your hair out of your face. Hair carries oil, which clogs pores, and when the hair touches your face, oil is spread all over it. I hope this helps and good luck!

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	3. Chapter 3

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 3 **

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

* * *

Dear Will, 

I am into sports and I have loads of friends. I'm at my friends' houses a lot, and my sports take two hours out of my evenings after school. With all this, I have hardly any time to do my homework, unless I stay up until one in the morning. I don't want to quit my sports because people will think I'm a lazy bum, but I'm not. So, if I tell my parents, they'll make me quit. I can't tell them. My grades are dropping little by little. What am I supposed to do?

Sincerely,

FutureF

Dear FutureF,

Well, you could try to not go to your friends' houses as much. Or try to do your homework during the day, like at lunch. And if you have a long bus ride, then you can try to do it on your way home. And if you still don't get it finished, you can leave a couple minutes of work time to do it the next morning on the bus. Some people, though, can't do this. Sometimes it's hard to concentrate, and even harder to write. But if you can take a CD player with soothing music to play, and a folder or notebook to write on, then you'll probably do okay. If this still doesn't help, I'm sorry, but you might have to just go ahead and quit your sports. But, I hope something I just told you would help and you won't have to give anything up.

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

Dear Irma, 

Oh my goodness! I'm going to be psychotic one of these days! I just know it! I'm in stinking love with a boy from my school, yet there's this really weird geek that won't stop leaving me alone and he practically asks me out every day of his life! He wants me to go to a movie with him. I don't want to! I like this other boy and he doesn't like me! I think it's because he thinks I'm a geek because of the geek who likes me! What can I do? I feel like strangling that kid!

Sincerely,

Geek-Loved & Popular, Hot-Guy Crazy (a.k.a. the author)

Dear Geek-Loved & Popular, Hot-Guy Crazy (a.k.a. the author),

I think you're taking this a little too seriously. You probably just have what is called 'puppy love' with that guy, and the so-called 'geek' won't probably like you that much longer. You should just try to explain to the geek that you really, really don't like him and he's ruining your life! No, I'm just kidding. You could say though that because of him liking you, someone else won't go out with you. That might help. He might back off then because he'll see he's making you mad and sad. And for the hot guy, just keep trying. It's worth a shot – or a million.

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

I love Math and I'm really good at it. I don't know why I like it so much, but I just love writing down numbers and making equations and stuff like that. My friends think differently. They make fun of me because I like it. They don't make fun of me because I'm good at it, because that'd be mean; they just tease me because I like it. I want to like it. I don't want to lie and say that I don't. But I want them to stop teasing me. What should I do or say to make them stop? Please help. Please.

Sincerely,

EMC2

Dear EMC2,

Nice name by the way. It sounds like it suits you. You just need to explain to your friends that you're getting tired of them teasing you and if they were your true friends, they wouldn't make fun of you for something you like. Then say something about what they like. If you know of something that's kind of odd that one of them likes, then start making fun of them and ask how they like it – but don't be too mean about it and don't do it forever or you might loose some friends. Just do it until they say they'll stop making fun of you. Hope that helps and good luck!

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

Dear Cornelia, 

I have a little brother and he annoys me to death! Don't get me wrong, I'd take my life for him, but he's so annoying for crying out loud! He is always pestering me to play videogames with him. A lot of the videogames are really stupid too, considering he's six years old. What can I do?

Sincerely,

NOT Kage-Ichihashi

Dear NOT Kage-Ichihashi,

By the way your name is, I'm going to guess that you actually ARE Kage-Ichihashi. But don't worry; I don't know who you are. Anyway, why don't you set a limit to how long you play with him? And only play certain games? Then some wouldn't disturb you and you would have time to do other things – like thinking of better names.

Sincerely,

Cornelia

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

My Grandma comes over to my house about once a week. She likes to hug me – A LOT! She is always pinching my cheeks and squeezing me until I can't breathe. What can I do!

Sincerely,

Will-Die-of-Suffocation

Dear Will-Die-of-Suffocation,

That's a difficult one. Hmm… maybe you could just politely ask her to not squeeze you as hard… because… you have asthma! YAY! I'm sorry… but just try to talk to her about it. Oh, and if you do suffocate and you are sent to the hospital, please send me your room number so I can come visit you!

Sincerely,

Hay Lin

Dear Hay Lin,

She's in room 312B.

Sincerely,

DID-Die-of-Suffocation's friends

Dear DID-Die-of-Suffocation's friends,

………………….

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	4. Chapter 4

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 4**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

A/N: Oh, and this week, I'm giving you TWO WHOLE chapters! YAY ME! See how much I love you guys? ESPECIALLY if you review? -HINT, HINT-

* * *

Dear Will, 

My friend has an obsession with cartoons. Help…. Please.

Sincerely,

Going Insane

Dear Going Insane,

Um…yea… Do you mean shehas_crushes_on cartoon characters?

Sincerely,

Will

Dear Will,

Yes….

Sincerely,

Going Insane

Dear Going Insane,

Well, that is a problem. I suggest taking her to a mental institute.

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

(This next one is serious and not meant to be funny.)

Dear Irma,

I have AIDS. I know that I'm going to die some day, and it makes it hard to live my life. It's hard for me because I have crushes, but I'll never have a boyfriend. And I'm starting to reject my family because I'm going into self-pity. And all my "so-called" friends are leaving me. What can I do?

Sincerely,

Infected

Dear Infected,

I am so sorry. But, I think you should just snap out of it and stop wallowing in your self-pity! Just… live every second to its fullest.

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

There's an owl that comes by my window every night and talks to me! AGH! Help!

Sincerely,

Owl-Stalked

Dear Owl-Stalked,

Well, I wouldn't find that too unbelievable… maybe you should move… or shoot the owl… Isn't that against the law? What kind of owl is it? Are you sure it's an owl? Don't shoot it if it's an eagle. That would be bad. Maybe you should try to not listen to the owl. Just, close your blinds and put earplugs in. Also, try to get more sleep. Okay? Hope that helps!

Sincerely,

Taranee

P.S. JAVA-JAVA-JAVA! (a.k.a. COFFEE-COFFEE-COFFEE!)

* * *

Dear Cornelia, 

My doggy died and my mom lied!

Sincerely,

Dog-less

Dear Dog-less,

Wow…. Uhh…. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown. I QUIT! GOODBYE!

Sincerely,

Cornelia

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

Why did Cornelia quit?

Sincerely,

Wonderer

Dear Wonderer,

I don't think she acts well under pressure…

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	5. Chapter 5

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 5**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates. (Or Naruto...)

* * *

Dear Will, 

I have braces. I hate eating at school because food gets stuck in them so easily. Also, my boyfriend has braces. I'm afraid to kiss him because our braces could get stuck together and our parents would freak out and call 911 and we would be so embarrassed! Please help!

Sincerely,

BraceFace

Dear BraceFace,

Chapstick does wonders. Oh - wait a minute - you don't have chapped lips. Sorry! Wrong letter! Um… maybe you shouldn't kiss at all if you're that scared something might happen. Just wait until they come off. Besides, you're young; you don't really need to be kissing right now anyway. As for the food part, just eat and then keep your mouth closed until you can get to a bathroom to brush your teeth.

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

Dear Irma, 

I want to become the next Hokage! BELIEVE IT!

Sincerely,

Naruto

Dear Naruto,

I do believe it. If you are determined enough and work as hard as you possibly can, you can do pretty much anything you set your mind to. Good luck with your dream!

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

My mom thinks she's Santa Claus.

Sincerely,

NickJr.

Dear NickJr.,

Um… well… support your mom's dreams!

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

**Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

My friend continuously sings out loud: "I am Don Quijotte de La Mancha!" Help my poor, pitiful pal.

Sincerely,

Sancho

Dear Sancho,

What is Don Quijotte de La Mancha? Well, um, perhaps you should tell him/her politely that it is annoying you, and he/she needs to stop.

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	6. Chapter 6

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 6**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

* * *

Dear Will, 

My twin sister has a fascination with our older sister's boyfriend's shoulders. Help me… please.

Sincerely,

Kurohasi

Dear Kurohasi,

Does she have a crush on him? That'd be funny. Well, I'm not exactly sure what you should do. Really, I don't. I SHOULD QUIT! CORNELIA, I'M COMING!

Sincerely,

Will

* * *

Dear Irma, 

I really like this HOT guy who doesn't like me. He also wants to kill his brother – literally.

Sincerely,

Sakura

Dear Sakura,

I think you should forget about this guy…. –twitches-

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

I have two younger sisters that are always trying to set me up with a guy. It's really annoying though. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Ichihashi

Dear Ichihashi,

Perhaps you could talk to them about it and tell them how you truly feel, and try your best to make them understand. If that doesn't work, punish them because you're their older sister so you can do that!

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

**Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I love eggnog waaayyyyy too much.

Sincerely,

DW

Dear DW,

Really? I like eggnog too! (lol)

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	7. Chapter 7

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 7**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

* * *

**Will quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Irma, 

What do I do when I find out I have two hot guys outside my window eavesdropping on my crazy conversation with my friend? I mean, it's okay that they're hot and all, but the problem is… they're cartoons.

Sincerely,

DolphinLuver

Dear DolphinLuver,

Well, you should open up the window and invite them in! It's rude to keep them outside! Even if they ARE cartoons! Geesh.

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

Dear Taranee, 

Why is Kakashi so hot? And perfect? And hot? And awesome? And hot?

Sincerely,

ScarecrowLuver

Dear ScarecrowLuver,

Um… I wonder who this Kakashi is but, I think you got the point across that he's hot. But, this is just ridiculous and I don't know how to answer that question. I QUIT!

Sincerely,

Taranee

* * *

**Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I miss Will, Cornelia, and Taranee. I hope you and Irma can hold out on us poor, needful, people.

Sincerely,

ChUcKyDoLl

Dear ChUcKyDoLl,

Yes, me too.

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	8. Chapter 8

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 8**

**Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates. **

* * *

**Will quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Irma, 

I was going to ask Cornelia this, but you and Hay Lin are the only ones left. But, why are blondes called stupid?

Sincerely,

Blonde

Dear Blonde,

…YOU ARE SO STUPID! AGH! I QUIT!

Sincerely,

Irma

* * *

**Taranee and Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

Mmmm… This root beer is good.

Sincerely,

We-don't-have-problems

Dear We-don't-have-problems,

Grrrrr.

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	9. Chapter 9

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 9**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

* * *

**Will, Irma, Taranee, and Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I'm so sad. My friends all left me for root beer.

Sincerely,

Hay Lin

Dear Hay Lin,

Hey! We have the same name! YAY US! I'm so depressed…

Sincerely,

Hay Lin


	10. Chapter 10

**WITCH Advice Givers**

**chapter 10**

Disclaimer: I do not own WITCH or any of its affiliates.

* * *

**Will, Irma, Taranee, and Cornelia quit. Remember? **

* * *

Dear Hay Lin, 

I just watched my poo swirl down the toilet. Then I saw my ring go down with it.

Sincerely,

Ringless

Dear Ringless,

………..You watch your own waste go down the toilet? Uh… I quit. Root beer, here I come!

Sincerely,

Hay Lin

* * *

**Author's note: If you have read each ond every single chapter in this series, THANK YOU! I know it was a little ditzy, but I thought it was hilarious. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Again, thank you. Goodbye!**

** Sincerely,**

**Hakaze Akikaze **


End file.
